The Shyness Rant

Shyness is something that I’ve lived with all my life. It’s been my best friend and my arch nemesis at the same time.
Best friend because it never leaves me alone and arch nemesis because… well, it never leaves me alone.
But before we dive deeper into this let me clarify one thing, if y’all don’t know it already of course , that shyness and introversion are two different things. Do not mix the two, I am a shy introvert but not all introverts are shy.
So anyway let’s get back to shyness. It is the anxiety one feels around people or in social situations/crowded places. Well that’s just the basic definition. Shyness involves awkward phone conversations and chats, thinking a million times before saying something but still ending up saying something incredibly stupid, something you regret saying the moment it comes out of your mouth. And then defending yourself because hey I am shy but I can stand up for myself, okay.
You frequently face situations where you’re sitting amongst a group of new people and all of a sudden one of them asks you to say something because you have been quiet all the time. Suddenly all the eyes are on you, waiting for you to open your mouth and utter those precious words of wisdom, and you just end up asking what they want you to say. I have been in such a situation countless times and okay, maybe people do it to make you feel included, but trust me guys if you’re doing it, stop.For the love of god, please stop. Because it is extremely embarrassing and a horribly mean thing to do to someone who’s already uncomfortable.
Going up and talking to someone new, even if it’s about something important is a herculean task for people my kind. And I would probably stay tongue tied around you, not because I have a crush on you but because that’s how I am around any human being.
I know, I don’t like being that way either, but trust me I’ve tried to change that loads of times.
The worst part of being shy even more than the difficult conversations, is people asking you, ‘Why are you so shy?’ or ‘ Why don’t you talk?’
My dear people I do not have a direct answer to your question but because it bothers you so much,just because it’s driving you absolutely crazy and you’re dying to know the reason behind my shyness, I’ll try to frame an answer for you.
I am so quiet because maybe your personality puts me off or maybe because I am thinking of a million different ways to get out of the damned situation. Or probably I have an attitude problem or I am some freak who takes everything very seriously,  or maybe because I am really, really, like unbelievably arrogant, I probably think that I am the queen of heaven and all of you mortals should bow in front of me.'( This doesn’t sound as dramatic as it did in my head, but whatever).
Jokes apart, I would be lying if I say that shyness does not control a lot of facets of my life, and there aren’t times when I’ve wished to master the art of making smooth conversations, but I do try to make things work and try to overcome my shyness, because I hate how it makes a lot of things unnecessarily tough, I hate how frequently people judge my career choices or advise me to talk more as if I haven’t tried it countless times.
But it is not the only thing that defines me as a person, there’s more to me than that. And I would highly appreciate if you don’t make unasked assumptions like I’ve had a traumatic childhood or I am miserable and sad or about to cry.
And finally, for all of my fellow shy peeps out there ,I know it isn’t easy but don’t let your shyness hinder you. Go give your name for that dance competition you wanted to,go grab that opportunity you’ve waited for so long, try saying stuff that’s on your mind even if it sounds horrendously dumb, do whatever you want to and let nothing stop you.

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6 thoughts on “The Shyness Rant

  1. Yess I agree with this! I’ve been shy most of my life, but I was never an introvert! People need to learn the difference between being shy and being introverted ❣️❣️

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Great post by the way ✨💞

        Liked by 2 people

  2. As a fellow shy person, I can totally relate with you. I’ve tried many ways of addressing this issue, and have recently learned about a technique that might help, and that’s to ‘collect failures’.

    Many times I’m shy because I’m afraid what people think of me, or that I’ll screw up the conversation.

    But if I collect failures, then I won’t be so bothered by the outcome, since failing would mean a win for me.

    Anyway, thanks for this post!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much! Glad you liked it and yes I would definitely try out the trick!!☺️

      Liked by 1 person

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